The no name shape
Made with no congruent peers in mind
Born to be a one piece puzzle
Impossible to take apart
Surreal to see in the flesh
Built to last and always alone
You can’t squeeze it in over there or just force it in by smashing it…
You ever feel like you just don’t fit in any of the molds set up before you? Like no matter where you go or how you try it just can’t work? Upon graduating from college I was determined to find a job in my field for my gap year. I was hired and offered jobs in three different cities and for three different positions; I’m young and trying to earn and save as much coins as possible, so I went with the position that paid the most and it just so happened to be somewhere closer to home. I could visit my family more often and they could visit me. Caught up in the joy of relocating for a new job, making better money, and being in a fresh new environment, I disregarded the woes of the actually relocating. They wanted me to start the next week. FAST AF. I’m living in Tallahassee where everything fits just right at the time and seemed to be getting better by the day. But life is about adapting to change so get with it sus!
SO QUICK MAKE A CHECKLIST FOR YOUR NEW LIFE.
1. Fuck it up like it’s ya birthday bihhh YOUS EMPLOYEDDD
2. *Ok. Calm down.* And figure out how tf you’re going to tell your BF, who at this point you’re damn near living with because you just go home to get more clothes, you got the job and he needed to brace his self for this transition to Long Distance Lovers.
3. Girl ya lease not even up yet. You have a lot of shit. How you moving it all?!
4. TF ARE YOU STAYINGGG? What areas are considered the hood? What’s a good area to stay in? Uhhh… ok kinda priceyyy… let’s try good with reasonable pricing — Search Results = 0
5. Telling your bestest college friends you were leaving them. (They’re going to hate me)
So as I made my way down the checklist things didn’t really feel hopeful but it was a new city, new energy, and new vibes. What’s worst that could happen right? Except for you just not clicking with the city and the traffic and the energy. So it was time to revisit the list.
1. Work was still straight but hey it’s just training.
2. Reoccurring side chick problems… yeah we’re done
3. Paying rent in two cities *STRONG EYE ROLL* Packed and moved all my shit ALONE.
4. CHILEEE. *Face Palm*
5. Just as I guessed THEY HATED ME. *Face Palm x3*
But I decided to continue to stick it out. Work environment felt great for the most part and they provided a extensive support system. But everything outside of work just seemed to fall short. Always incomplete. Always uneasy. And lacking comfort. The desire to go back home just continues to grow. I don’t like it here. Transfer me Jesus.